what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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