whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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