so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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