I wish my penis had an off switch
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
