Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
