can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i think i have herpe
just one?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
