OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
