I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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