Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize