I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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