hotel room ftw
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I didn't shave. On purpose
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize