Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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