since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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