One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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