I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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