turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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