Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
