Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize