His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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