so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
