No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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