We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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