Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize