therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
