He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
The uberlube is also flammable
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
