@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
