Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
