hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Randomize
