i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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