I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
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so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
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he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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