and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
