She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
