I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
