after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
