There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
