Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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