Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I think your dad took our porno
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
