she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!