he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
