She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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