Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize