You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize