i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize