I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize
