just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
