She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize