Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
