I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Buhtt sex?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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