My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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