Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
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i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
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Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
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