OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
